{ Where did time go? }

Tonight I went to school to try and petition for a class. As I was walking across campus everyone looked so......young? (like my younger bro's age) What the...??? ...foreals?! Where did time go?! For the first time I felt...'older'. haha Seriously though -sometimes I still feel like I just graduated. I can't even believe how fast these last couple years have gone by....must be because how fast things just happened.

18-I met my husband

19-I was engaged

20-I got married, then knocked up

21-I had a baby

23-I now have a toddler

WTF(udge)?!

I grew up so fast! Funny story though..

A couple months after we got married Saf and I went to the bowling alley for one of his co-worker's birthdays. After bowling everyone went to the karaoke bar inside the alley. Saf's friend wanted us to come watch him and his cousins sing so Saf told him we'll come watch real quick on our way out. Everyone started walking in and just as Saf is about to walk in I stop him and quietly said without anyone else hearing (because I was embarrassed lol)...

me: "Babe they're IDing at the door. What am I suppose to do?" 

Saf: "huh? what are you talking about?"

me: "I'm not even 21! How am I going to get in?!"

Saf: "Sorry babe..I totally forgot your age! HAHAHA!"

me: (annoyed/embarrased face)

Luckily, people are always (for some unknown reason??) intimidated by my husband so they didn't ask for my ID when I walked in with him.

It's crazy how things happen so fast and in a blink of an eye it's already "5 years down the road"....and I'm pretty sure time isn't going to slow down.

 In Neiafu with Grama & Grampa...priceless!

 ALL BLACKS game with Tabi in NZ

 concert with my loves...fun night!

HB dances...good times!

{ Donate }

 So Mondays have become my 'inspirational days'. If school work doesn't get too hectic I'm going to try and post something every Monday of something that inspired me (to help get my week going)...

I was reading one of my sister's blog posts (malo Ruby!) and she shared this link to another blog that changed my perspective. If you have time read this blog, or at least this post "perspective" (and even if you don't, make time) It's about this young mother's fight to save her baby's (Ruby Jane) life who is in need of a new liver. I read this blog and just bawled! It hit so close to home, as it would any mother. After I read it I went and smothered my Safi boy with hugs and kisses! (Of coarse he hated it. haha He's not the soft type) That night I left the dirty dishes in the sink, could care less about my cheap, dirty carpet, and didn't care about how much I weighed because I had my greatest blessing in my arms. My son. I slowed down a little bit and soaked up every moment with him!

I have no complaints in my life! I have my husband, son, family, and the knowledge of the gospel -everything else that I had gotten caught up with (wishing I had a bigger home, figuring out what I'm going to cook tonight, annoyed my husband had to work another weekend) became so insignificant.

I love waking up early in the morning to my husband calling me as he's driving home from work because that means I have a hard working man who wants to take care of us and put food on the table. I love cooking a hearty meal for my boys. I love folding endless laundry because that means  we have lots of clothes to wear and people to wear them. I love soothing my son back to sleep in the middle of the night because that means I'm needed. I love having my own home to clean. I love just doing all the simple daily to-do's because really, looking back these will become cherished memories.

So what's the purpose of me writing this post anyway?

If you read the blog you would realize that by being a potential donor you can give the gift of life to those who are in great, desperate need of it. Ruby Jane's story made such an impact on me that I made sure I was a donor. If it were my son who was sick and in need of a new liver I would hope and pray that there was someone out there who would give him the gift of life by donating.

So if you're reading this -check your drivers license for a small, pink dot that says "DONOR". If there is not one than you can sign up here to become one. It only take one minute out of your day. One of my new resolves is to "act instead of be acted upon". I hope that by this act of becoming a donor and spreading the word of 'Donate Life America' someone's baby (or loved one) will be saved.

{ A Mother's Heels }

You know how they say women who don't know how to walk in heels shouldn't wear them. Well, mothers are on a whole 'notha level than your average (child-less) woman. Mothers who don't know how to run in heels shouldn't wear them!

It's Sunday. I'm at church chasing after my 20 month old as he makes a run for it down the looooooooooong isle towards the front podium so he can run up "the stairs" (his favorite thing to play on). Normally I would just let my 'lil untamed beast go and have my husband go after him or I'll just turn my head and pretend that he is not my child, but since I was husband-less today I figured I better catch him early while he was only 5 pews ahead instead of waiting and then chasing him through the choir seats up in the front where the entire congregation is focused.

As I was chasing him down in my heels I was hating myself for my shoe selection this morning. I was running while at the same time trying to balance myself because I didn't want to be that mother who fell during sacrament meeting because her heel bent while she was running after her child and then nearly breaking her ankle along with her hand on her way down to the floor! (Trust. I've seen it happen).So I'm running down the isle, I start to feel my center of gravity shift annnnnnnnd...................I grab the back of my son's shirt and swoop him up! (and you thought I was going to fall. HA!) I'm SAAAAAAAFE! (no running to the front of the chapel for me and no falling on my face!)

As I'm walking my son out I think to myself, "Why am I STILL wearing heels?! This should have stopped when I was pregnant. An active kid + mommy in heels = highly possible disaster!" Then I realized I just can't give up my heels. I refuse to retire them just because I'm a 'mommy'. (The only time I've 'temporarily retired' them was when I was prego and that was because my legs and feet swelled causing cankles. lol) Not only do I hate flats but Sunday is the only day I really 'get ready' (as in put on some make up, tame my hair with hair product, and make sure my legs are shaven) Any other day you'll see me looking like a boy wearing my husband's basketball shorts, a T, slippers, and my hair pulled back in a bun or ponytail. Sundays are the only day I look together, like a woman. So since heels are the epitome of a womanly attire AND I mastered the art of running in heels, I'm going to keep rockin' these bad girls....or at least until the cankles return.

{ baby gone Gogh }

My son needed to do something other than watch Toy Story 3 or The Princess and the Frog all day so I got a little creative. I put my son in the tub and let him paint away with colored shaving cream. He la la LOVED it! I think I saw a bit of Van gogh in his work. (maybe he'll be artistic like his momma)

momma's highlight:
-watching baby paint his entire face and all that was visible was his big brown eyes
-baby trying to paint with his toes
-seeing him smiling and laughing!

baby's highlight:
-making the biggest mess with out getting in trouble by momma
-slip n' slide in the shaving cream

This was so cheap and easy. And it's all in the bath tub so it's an easy clean up. Just rinse off the walls and tub (with baby in it) with water. (i was afraid the food coloring wasn't going to come off baby -but it did! Good thing or else he was going to be the green machine for a couple of days!)

All you need:

-cupcake baking pan

-shaving cream ($1)

-a small spatula

-food coloring ($2)

Directions:

-squirt some shaving cream into each cupcake section

-add a couple drops of food coloring per section and stir (for a wider range of colors add different colors of food coloring in one section)

-grab a paint brush and you're ready!

{ cruise control thoughts }

Driving down the 57 freeway (no traffic), my son sitting quietly in his car seat, and Pandora is hitting all the good songs. [peace] Now I can just think...

- Personal power. Everyone has it. No one can take it away, it can only be given away. (random) Where do I give mine away?.... when I let others rule my emotions.

- Pet Peeve: I can't stand when the first thing someone says about some other person is the worst thing (if what they're actually saying is even true) that the other person has ever done. First of all, some of the things I've heard about other people I wish I never even knew because A) it's not even my business and B) honestly, it makes me feel a little uncomfortable when I see them in person. Second, I don't believe people are defined by their mistakes. Everyone has done something they're not proud of. (yes, everyone!) What matters is what a person is doing with their life now and where their heart is now. Third, if your the type to go out of your way to confess the sins of others by saying something like that about someone else, I wonder what others are saying about you???

- Ugh. Wish my husband didn't have to work tonight. It's Sunday. He should be with us. His work is burning him out and I hate seeing him like this. When he gets stressed, I get stressed. (and vice verse) So let's balance this out before someone has an 'anxiety attack' or 'angry outburst' haha...no, really.

- [listening to some song (don't even remember what song) that got me thinking about that time and I almost started crying] AH! I am way too emotional! haha Sometimes I get frustrated at Saf because of his 'emotional retardation' (ya, that's my best way to describe it) and I wish he expressed his emotions just a little more thoroughly. Then I imagined what that wish would be like... (out of no where this scenario just came to mind. don't laugh) We're in the delivery room and I just popped out our brand new baby girl (again, no -not prego. i just fantasize about having a girl next) The doc places her on my chest and I start bawling because I'm over joyed that I have my little girl. Then after Saf confirms it's a girl he starts bawling too (the type of bawling where you can't even breath because your snot-boogers are running down uncontrollably so you're forced to close your mouth and make grunting and wheezing noises) because it's a girl! (and not another boy) CRAP! We're both bawling and neither of us can even see or breath! Whose going to take care of baby now? Eh. I don't think I could handle someone who cried more than me. Over-emotional human + emotionally-retarded human = emotionally balanced. We balance each other out. And that is that.

- I miss my Grama Barlow. I wonder what it would be like if she was here right now. I miss going riding with her. I miss our talks. I miss our entire relationship.

[baby starts getting restless and crying - thoughts interrupted]

"Almost there baby."

{ Beach Bummin' }

Yesterday baby and I got out for the day. Even though we don't live that close to the beach (as close as I use to) -at least we live less than 40 minutes away because I would miss this too much... I planned it out. Once I have all my 'lil kiddies we'll be beach bummin' it everyday in the summer while daddy is at work -just like what our mommas did with us (my siblings, cousins, and I) I remember our mommas packing us all in the car and then swimming at the beach all day (and what seemed like almost every day) while they sat on the shore and watched the babies and made us food. I figured if I'm going to stay at home and take care of the kids why not just take care of them at the beach where they can run free, make all sorts of messes, and pee in the ocean.

 

And yes, I walked down this hill, all the way across the beach, and then back up again with my 30+ lbs kid on my shoulders -just because I was too cheap to pay for parking.

Momma's Beach Bum #1

{ my own season }

"To every thing there is a season and a time to every purpose under the heaven." Ecclesiastes 3:1

By now I thought I would have already been done with school and been somewhat on my way to my career. But school was put on pause, or should I say in slow motion, and my current career is changing poopy diapers and folding mountains of laundry...not quite what I had planned but still  -where I'm at now is better than anything I imagined (and I AM happy).

I've realized that just because something is the right choice, doesn't mean it's necessarily the right season for that choice. There's a time to every purpose...and sometimes your purpose for the time being is different than what you may have planned or hoped for.

I've accepted that what I'm doing and where I'm at now is in accordance to my season. And through faith, hope, and hard work my other seasons (finishing school, buying our first house, have my own hustle on the side, owning my own horse(s)...) will come to pass in due time.

Until then I'll continue to progress and move in my own time and my own season.

{ R&R: get organized }

New R & R (refresh & refine) goal for the week = selling these buggin' 22" rims and tires that are sitting in my bedroom killing space! (who stores 4 huge  rims/tires in their bedroom?!....WE DO! ugh, still irked about it) ...and to organize our entire place and throw out all the junk! Saf and I are both about to start school...more like, I'm about to be starting school for the both of us and I can't concentrate while looking at all this clutter!

As far as last weeks R&R, I did so good up until my husband did something that got my blood boiling--before I knew it I had a bowl of ice-cream in front of me. Talk about emotional eating! haha (that bowl of ice-cream just about saved my husband's life) But hey -I did pass up all the yummy chinese food at China Buffet and the dessert section. It's progress...

The bedroom makeover has begun...somewhat.(just waiting for these rims to  get lost and a little more dough in my pocket) I told Saf my plans for our room aaaaaand he 'says' he's NOT HAVING IT! Yeah right...you already know whose going to win this battle. I told him the person who cleans the house gets to decide how it is decorated! (sorry hun)

{ sprinting hills?...FUDGE! }

Today I had to take a break from P90x (and Tony's voice)...so instead I went for a run.

My inspiration for my previous post came today while I was running. I was at the bottom of the hill and thought, "ugh...wish i didn't have these stretch marks on my tummy!...how did i miss the 'no stretch mark gene' from my mom?!...it must have skipped a generation...FUDGE!!!..I may not be able to make the stretch marks go away but i can make the baby fat disappear, right?...RIGHT!" ...which then was my sudden, great motivator to sprint to the top of this steed, colossal hill (above) Yuuuup, not a good idea. This pic was taken right before I died!

{ battle scars }

I know this isn't the prettiest picture...and it may disgust (or petrify) most but I just had to post it.

...said so beautifully! 

Mothers sacrifice so much -even their own bodies. And if you were one of those women who looked like those beautiful-skinny-whose ankles were still smaller than their knees models you see in the MOTHERHOOD MATERNITY advertisments or you took those prego photos where you're rockin' a bare belly with out it looking like a tiger attacked you -I've decided you're NOT HUMAN, rather a clone-alien paid by the real mother to carry and bear her child while she takes a vacay to Cabo for 9 months! (or that's what I'd like to believe because the Palmer's cocoa butter didn't really work any miracles for me) I don't know what kind of water those lucky women were drinking when they were pregnant but I wish I had some of it!

When I look in the mirror at my battle scars (referring to the battle of pregnancy) I'm not going to lie -I feel like a piece of me (or my body) died after having a baby, and in a sense it did because it will never be the same. I asked my husband if my 'scars' bother him -he say's they don't (i mean, they better not because I did carry YOUR kid for 9 months AND gave birth to him) He's a man -all he's worried about is multiplying and replenishing the earth. 

Whenever I do start feeling a little down about it I think to myself:

-Does my husband still think I'm sexy? (yes)

-Do I work (as in, able to bear children)? (yes)

-Do I have a beautiful, healthy son who I just love to pieces? (yes)

-I can at least still have a flat, toned stomach, right?  (yes..well, maybe.. if you work your butt off and lay off the icecream)

But if I had do it all over again I would -in an instant! I carried a LIFE, I created LIFE...and having these battles scars to show from it is just a small price to pay.

(and just in case you were wondering...i've never had my belly button pierced -this is not an actual pic of my belly lol)

{ babies }

This picture makes me happy!

These two are total opposites but the love is still there...

...can't wait for the little princess to get here Friday! (or sooner)

{ R&R: No more junk }

Sundays seem to always be my refresh & refine day -so today I made a new 'refine' goal.

  - For the rest of August I'm giving up all sweets, anything with refined sugar, and anything white (as in breads, rice, and pasta) -

I realized if I'm going to break my back (almost literally) doing P90X, I need to cut the junk food if I want to see any results -Otherwise, I'm putting all this work in for FREE! (Abs are made in the kitchen, right?) 

So buh-bye Nutella...you will always be my main squeeze indulgence.

Adios Del Taco...I could always count on you, especially on those late night runs.

So long chocolate...Reese's, your still my chocolate HUNK. (shhh...don't tell my husband that)

 

 Sayonara rocky road ice-cream...I'm going to miss the way you melt in my mouth.

As long as I don't sleep-eat...I can handle this. 

*Note to husband: You better believe, if I'm doing this -your doing it too! I can't be having you coming home and eating the good stuff in front of me. Get wit' it or get lost!

{ how to work the system }

" D I S M I S S E D! "

...did I just get out of paying a $400 ticket?

HELL YA I DID! Take that you sorry, egocentric police officer!

This morning I went to my court appearance and got out of yet another traffic ticket, which would have been a whomping  $400 fine! If you know my husband or I, you know how many FA-rikkin' traffic tickets we get! Honestly, it's ridiculous!!!! Once we got three in one week! ...but I swear we're not bad drivers! The cops here are just delusional and must see a huge sign on the back of our car that says "PULL ME OVER, PLEASE". And we just have a higher percentage of getting pulled over than the average driver because we're forever driving around all of Southern California on a regular basis.

So this ticket was the fourth one we've gotten out of...I think...honestly, we've both lost count now. (ya -there's been that many) We've pretty much been to at least one courthouse in each county (the farthest in Ventura County) So we could tell you how each courthouses' system works (because they're all different)

Now if you want to be like every other American who gets a traffic ticket you can:

A) get got and just pay the fine in full amount
B) fail to appear in court/pay the bail amount and get your license suspended/have a warrant out for your arrest
or
C) work the system

Now this is how you work the system (mainly for speeding tickets):
-once you get your ticket in the mail read the paper or go online and know how that courthouse's system works
-you want to postpone your court appearance as long as you possibly can-that way the officer hopefully forgets about your case or looses his paper work for your ticket (depending on the courthouse. you can extend the date to pay the bail amount and then right before it's actually due -schedule to make a court appearance -but again, check with the courthouse first because they're all different)
-when you go to the first court appearance -always plead not guilty  (unless it's for running a red light in an intersection with a camera -you'll NEVER win on those, or something like you didn't have your license or insurance) If you were driving while talking/texting on your cell phone, you have a fix-it-ticket, or other -those offenses are pretty black and white so it will be hard to win NOT GUILT, so plead GUILTY (if the judge is nice enough they'll lower the amount you have to pay)
-when you plead NOT GUILTY you'll be scheduled another court appearance on a different day because they have to subpoena the officer who issued your ticket
-your next court appearance (usually a couple months later-again, if you can postpone this for as long as you can) is a gamble! -if your officer doesn't show up to court your case is automatically dismissed (you don't have to pay the fine or your refunded it in 4-6 weeks and you get no point on your driving record) If he does show up -that's where you have to get kind of creative with your plea.(if you have a 'lawyer friend' this is where you should get their advise -not mine! lol)
-so far we've never had to state a plea because we postponed our trial months, almost a year later, that the officer never showed up -so a "no show" (of your officer) is what your hoping for.
-worst case scenario -if you plead NOT GUILTY and are found GUILTY, you will not be able to attend traffic school (which will give you a point on your driving record) and you will have to pay the original amount of your traffic violation.

Oh ya, and when you go to court, dress decently. Don't wear a hat, sunglasses, a white-T, basketball shorts, and Jordan slippers (like my husband -he learned the hard way lol)

...but I guess the best advice in how to avoid going through all the above -follow the law or don't get caught.



**disclaimer: if your dumb enough to think I'm some type of lawyer -I'm not! So don't take this info too seriously if it doesn't work for you. This is just what has worked out for us.