{ who knew we were making memories }

"Yesterday is history, tomorrow a mystery, today is a gift, that's why it's called the present." As I grow older and wiser I am learning what the gift of today truly is. The other day I was looking through some saved old photos on my computer. They brought back a rush of different emotions. Some made me feel happy, others longing for 'those days,' some sad because of the difficult things I was going through at the time, and others grateful for all that I have and the experiences I have gone through.

 While I was looking at these photos I thought, "Wow, if only I knew I was making memories at that moment in time...maybe I would have laughed a little more, slowed down just a little so I could have really taken in the whole experience, stopped fretting over silly things, or held my son just a minute longer while he was still so small... I'm not trying to live in the past or with any regrets, but just learn from it and live every present moment to the fullest so I don't have to try and re-live it later. I want to look back and know that I allowed myself to be the happiest I could have possibly been and know that nothing (time, energy, or happiness) was wasted because most of these moments don't last long and only come once.

*My life has evolved rapidly and dramatically over the last 5-6 years. I have learned and in a positive way, changed. Here's a few photos I came across and what I would have said at the time to that person (me) in the photo. Enjoy!

left: (Wihongi girls at church) "First of all, you don't even realize how blessed you are to grow up so close with all your cousins, go to same the same school, and be in the same ward. And your not going to realize this great blessing until you're on your own and married. By then everyone will be gone either getting married, serving a mission, or moving half way across the world. SO cherish these times now" center: (all of us at a HB YSA dance) "Dance the night away! Don't worry that your cousin just caught you wearing her shirt that she let your sister borrow because she's forgotten about it. FORGET THE DRAMA and just marry the guy!" right: (Girls Night Out-karaoke in NZ)"Be happy. Don't listen to anyone but yourself. Enjoy the night out because soon they become RARE and hurry and get back to the states already! "

TONGA 2007: "So far this is *still the BEST TRIP IN YOUR LIFE! Don't worry because you lived these moments to the fullest! Eventually your going to have to learn to speak Tongan because YOU HAVE TO GO BACK...oh ya, and because you do end up marrying that loud, funny guy."

"Dating days..THOSE WERE THE DAYS! Enjoy them girl because you only fall in love once. After THIS night though things are going to get a lil crazy. You will be faced with the hardest trial yet in your life. But don't worry because THIS will make you stronger. You'll learn from it and be better because of it. Your answer the first time was right so stop asking. Oh ya.. STOP being so nice and forget what everyone else thinks. Either do it how YOU want or don't do one at all. You're wedding will be a huge fiasco and mess...but don't worry. Just because you didn't have the wedding of your dreams, you still got the man of your dreams."

"Live it up girl! The 'honeymoon' stage is something! This mini vacay to San Diego is the only one you guys are going to have with just you two. Go out as much as you can together, sleep in as long as you want, and get in as much of your husband's lovin' as you can. haha ...because 7 months from now your going to give birth to a MONSTER! just kidding. He's the best!"

.

"Awww he is so PRECIOUS! I can't believe how small and immobile he use to be. haha THIS is your greatest blessing! Enjoy every moment because you're going to blink and he'll already be walking. Not only does he look like his daddy but he acts like him in every way! ...but you're going to hope your next one isn't as crazy as him. That's for sure!"

The secret to this short life is to live in the present every moment....because who knew we were making memories?

{my sleepy-dilemma}

*disclaimer: there is really no point to this entry. i'm just tired, annoyed with myself, and in need of a good laugh. I promise my next entry will have a purpose. haha

so i woke up this morning with chocolate candy wrappers on the floor next to my side of the bed and a sore tummy. "what the frik?! tell me those are from my husband and not me?!" .....yuuuuuup, they were from me. ugh. i have a confession to make. you know how some people sleep-talk..others sleep-walk...well, I sleep-eat. yes, sleep-eat as in i totally don't recall getting up in the middle of the night, walking to the kitchen, and eating half a dozen cookies. i don't know why i do this...or how to stop it. what's even worse is Saf will be up watching tv and he'll see me do this and not do anything, but laugh at me the next day when i ask him where the rest of ice cream went. jerk. since i've been on my "get-right-loose weight-before i have another baby" spree i've been doing good at watching what i eat in the day time....but once the bedtime rolls around, i'm done for! i'm not too sure what triggers these episodes but let me take a wild guess....STRESS! maybe it would help if i added in a couple more "woooosaaaaaaas" into my day or invested in a punching bag, better yet use my husband as one. or maybe i just need to padlock the fridge, freezer, and pantry every night before i go to sleep. eh. i need to figure something out soon before i accidentally sleep-walk again and eat my own hand off! ok. it's late. i'm tired. time for bed. wish me luck tonight!

PS. when i googled "sleep walk eating" i  found out that it's actually a disorder. i don't know if i should laugh or cry. maybe i better look a lil more into that. haha

*oh ya...if i see you in person please don't make fun of my sleep-eating disorder. i'll kill you. jp. no really though.

{ Comfortable in my own SKIN }

I came across this Nike ad and loooooved it! This pic is most definitely me. haha The one part of my body that never seems to shrink are my thighs! My husband laughs at me every time he watches me jump up and down, bend over, squat, pull, and kick just to get my jeans up over my thighs and fitted right. Growing up I let myself  be so self conscious about them, but now I've realized my thighs are never going to look like those women's thighs you see in magazines. And I don't want them to. A little thickness in the right parts never hurt anybody!
It wasn't an easy journey but I am now comfortable in my own skin. I am embracing what my mama gave me and rockin' these thunder thighs! ;)

{Welcome to my brand-spanking-NEW blog!}

I've finally decided to make my blog 'public,' instead of 'private' so people could actually see it. haha I'm a pretty private person but decided to open myself up in a new way to others. I'm still trying to figure the whole blogger-thing out so this is still 'under construction' and has a few glitches...but if I waited to open this up once I thought it was perfect then it was never going to happen. I love to create, write, take pics, reminisce, and record so here's my 'lil corner of the internet where I do just that. This blog is dedicated to my inspirations, my perception on things, my influence and effect, and life as I know it.

People will forget what you did..people will forget what you said..but they never forget how you made them feel. My hope is that whatever you read or see in here will cause you to feel in some way inspired, make you see things in a different way, or the very least, spark a smile. 

So....this is me.

{ It's the X! }

As of yesterday I am back on the P90x wagon...again! When I woke up this morning I could barely roll over in bed because my body was so sore and achy....and that was only from the first day. haha For all you mommas out there, this program really works if you stick with it, and it saves you time and money from going to the gym. I do the workouts in my family room with my 18 month old son. (My lil buff guy does the push ups with me.) 

My goal is to get through the entire program (all 13 weeks) and drop 10 lbs by the end of it....because I got to keep it toned and tight for my husband and stay healthy for my son. ;)

 

 Sorry...NOT going to post any "before" pics, maybe "after" ones. haha Let's see where I'm at in a month. 

Let's do this!

{ Simple Things #1 }

60+ hours of work a week is nice once you see the paycheck deposited into your account...but sometimes money just isn't worth the lost time. I'm grateful for my Sugardaddy's rare Saturday off. <3

{ my SON }

This kid! haha He's forever keeping me on my toes and making me smile. He has the biggest personality compacted in a small body.  These last couple weeks have been hard with my husband working 60+ hours a week but I'm never lonely because I have this 'lil guy with me always.

Last night as I was holding him in my arms soothing him to sleep I was reminded once again that he is what matters most. I could loose everything tomorrow but still be happy because I have him. He truly is our everything.

[favorite "mommy moments"] 

-watching him sleep

-seeing how much he looks up to his daddy and wants to be like him

-when he randomly walks over to me and gives me a big uma

[funniest moments]

-let's Moko (the dog) lick inside his mouth (ok, maybe that's a little more gross than funny)

-makes this funny face when he scrunches up his nose and makes 'fish lips'

-kisses the girls on the playground (yup, he's already a ladiesman)

[cutest moments]

-he always has to lay in between my husband and I (and if there's no room he pushes us apart until there is)

-when he talks to smaller babies in his 'high pitch-baby talk tone' (like grown ups do)

-when he comes to me so I'll kiss his 'booboos,' then runs away smiling

He is such a handful and has energy for days but I wouldn't trade him for anything because he's my son.